Rules of Engagement

Dear Madonna,

First of all, you missed a fabulous weekend in Toronto. The 2Some Dance Event, and especially the "Westie Room" ROCKED the Hilton Toronto. The highlight for me was dancing an impromptu showcase piece with my good friend Mike Topel, Shelley, Nick & Clem. I haven't had as many bruises since I did those pole-dancing classes but it was a blast!

I'm dancing Tango tonight, which I lovingly think of as an excercise in submission - even more so when you take into account that Tango etiquette has a reputation for being, well, a bit harsh. I came across something this week that I found a bit disturbing:

http://www.close-embrace.com/invitingetiquette.html

It sent me back to review a hand-out I wrote a few years ago on the subject....

1. There are no gender rules for who asks whom to dance, i.e. it’s perfectly acceptable for gals to ask guys. (Or even for gals to ask gals and guys to ask guys. Hey – it’s only dancing!)

2. It’s not cool to turn down someone who asks you to dance. Notable exceptions:

(i) You’ve just danced to either a really fast song, or several songs in a row, and need to catch your breath and cool down, in which case you can tell the person that you will find them for a dance later - AND DO IT!

(ii) You really, really dislike the music that's playing; in which case, again, you can tell the person that you’ll get them for a better song later.

(iii) The person who asked you is drunk or has proven to be rough and difficult to dance with; you're legitimately concerned about your safety on the dance floor (and the safety of others.) Luckily this is a pretty rare worst-case scenerio.

3. Do you wanna dance? These behaviours will defnitely increase your floor-time.

(i) Bathe. Make sure your breath is fresh. If you tend to perspire heavily, consider bringing extra clothes to change into so that your partners don’t have to share your sweat.

(ii) Stay engaged in what’s going on. Stand, don’t sit. Watch the dancing, and see if there’s anyone you want to dance with. Chances are they’ll be flattered you asked.

(iii) Enjoy yourself while you’re dancing. Don’t hold back! Your energy and joy will attract partners, and admirers!

4. Good talk/bad talk. Good talk is when you compliment your partner. Bad talk is when you try to ‘teach’ or tell your partner what to do on the dance floor.

It's finally summer here in Toronto. I'm going to get on my bike today and enjoy it!

Julie